YOU Don’t Have to Do It All

I have a confession to make: I put a lot of pressure on myself to get things done as quickly as possible. And, a lot of the time, that pressure sucks.

But, my husband, best friend, roommate, and birthday boy as of tomorrow, Diego has taught me an invaluable lesson that really makes me rethink that pressure:

You don’t have to do it all on your own.

Thanks to him, I’ve started to realize that it’s OK to not only lean on him, but all of the people who offer to help me on the crazy days. 

Let me give you an example of this in action.  

Just a few weeks ago, I shared a story with all of you on Instagram about a hard day where nothing seemed to go right. Usually I would feel like I had to solve all of these problems by myself immediately, but now that I’m working on asking for help more often, I actually leaned on the people around me. Diego dropped off the clothes I forgot to take to the laundromat, my Mom figured out a way to get me the ribbon I couldn’t seem to find anywhere in NYC, and one of my bridesmaids sent out an email I hadn’t had the chance to write yet.

Just like that, some of the amazing people in my life took 3 things off my plate—without me even asking. Each of them offered their help when I talked to them about the situation and all I did was take them up on it. And, as a result, I was able to go for a much needed run to clear my head and went to bed feeling proud and grateful. 

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While I think it’s useful to learn from other people’s examples, I also think it’s important to have real, actionable advice to learn from too. So, here are a few tips to make this a reality in your own life:

1. Learn to love the word DELEGATE

Delegate is defined as “to entrust (a task or responsibility) to another person.” Learn to embrace this word and it will become your new best friend. Here are some small ideas to get you started:

  • Ask someone else to pick a spot for dinner and make the reservation
  • Pay a few extra dollars at the laundromat for someone to wash and fold your clothes (take it from me, this one is a life-changer)
  • Ask your assistant to book a room for your upcoming meeting
  • Take your friend up on their offer to pick up lunch for you on a busy day
  • Have your groceries delivered to your door when your schedule is too crazy

2. Ask yourself one simple question

I find that I have a tendency to wait until someone offers to help me versus asking them for help outright. I’ve learned (and am working on embracing the fact that) you don’t have to wait that long. Instead, start asking yourself this one easy question when you’re looking at everything you have to do:

Am I the only person who can complete this task?

If the answer is “no”, try to figure out who can help you and how, and lean on those around you. The people in your life will likely be more than happy to help relieve some stress in your life. Just be sure to be respectful and don’t take advantage.

3. Embrace how uncomfortable this might make you feel at first

This one has been really hard for me because it sometimes feels awkward to ask for help. But, learn to embrace those feelings and you’ll learn so much about yourself, get passed the awkwardness, and reap the benefits in no time.

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Now that you have some action items, here’s my challenge to you: stop being afraid to ask for help and just do it. Lean on the people around you and you’ll likely be surprised by how many people are willing to help you when you need it.

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Have you turned to the people in your life to help lessen the load in the past? If so, what were the results? Were you grateful you did it?  I’d love to hear your examples and maybe even include them in my July Wrap-Up in a few weeks!

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